Book Release

For years people have been asking me to write a book. I’ve joked that if I did it would be entitled, “A Case Study On How NOT To Do Missions,” or “The Top 1000 Mistakes I’ve Made in Ministry.” I’ve compromised and have written a book that is a mission guide called, The Journey of a Post-Modern Missionary: finding one’s niche in cross-cultural ministry.

The Journey Of A Post-Modern Missionary

The success of one living overseas is finding job satisfaction. The importance of occupational contentment is true with any person anywhere in the world, but it is particularly true with missionaries. This book demonstrates that finding one's niche is a process. Happy is the person who discovers their niche early in life. The discovery of giftedness, for many of us, however, is usually long and uncertain.

Though this book is autobiographical, at the conclusion of each chapter are journey niche notes, which are practical applications of lessons learned. Niche notes also answer some of the common questions I’ve received from over thirty years in training and coaching missionaries in over twenty countries.

There are three ways you can order this book. (1) A signed copy through our website, (2) Through our publisher, Xulon Press and Amazon.com,(3) Through our office mailing address.

I See Dead People

How many movies can you identify from a phrase?

“Truth, you want truth? You can’t handle the truth.”

“Look up in the sky! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s ….!

“I am the patron saint of mediocrity?

“Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.”

I was reminded of great movie lines from listening to sermon this past week when the pastor said, “I see dead people. I see them all the time.”

Of course that line was from the movie the “Sixth Sense,” the little boy who saw the dead walking around, and who helped Bruce Willis understand that he, indeed, was dead.

The pastor made a wonderful application using that phrase, suggesting that it would be a great to have a t-shirt with the words printed on it, “I see dead people.” It certainly would be a conversation starter. I’m not big on T-shirt evangelism, but that is one that I might embrace, if I was a visiting professor at a secular university.

In reality, we are all dead-men walking. No one knows the time of our demise, but each day we not only live, but we are in the process of dying. Today the cancer (or heart disease, diabetes, etc.) may not yet be detected in my body, but somewhere, sometime, the inevitable will be revealed. Of course, there are other dynamics in this world that may determine my end, like war, accident or maybe the pandemic bird flu. Morbid, I agree, but reality, nevertheless.

If you feel good physically and don’t know you’re sick you’re probably feeling pretty good. We go out to dinner, make plans for weekend fun and even plan toward retirement. Yeah, we know we will die some day, but the doctor has given us a clean bill of health so we’re not thinking about the reality that each second we go further into physical decay, one second closer to eternity.

Beyond than physical, I see the spiritually dead. People, young and old, of every nation are physically able but spiritually dead. Like their physical condition, people may be moral, even religious. They are not murderers, thieves and they even try to help people in their community. Some go to the temple or church everyday to pray, they may even give money to the poor. And yet, with all that seemingly healthy spirituality (the new term today…"I'm not religious, but I am spiritual") they are in reality dead.

“There is a way that seems right to man,” the ancient preacher said, “but his way leads to death.” Most people think that that way they are following, from a religion to good works, will lead them to God, but not all roads lead to heaven. For the followers of Christ we were dead, yet we are alive.

Why do I do what I do, living overseas away from family to teach others how to present the message of Christ and salvation? It’s because I see dead people. I see them all the time.

Intellectual Transformation

In one of my classes I talk about the importance of epistemology, which is a branch of philosophy in the study of knowledge. My question before the students is, “How did you come to know what you know, and how do you know what you know is right?”

I contend that most of a person’s personality is determined at birth, i.e. the culture in which we are born with all its implications (race, gender, socio-economics, ethnicity, religion etc.), and therefore accounts for most of how we come to know what we know. Somewhere between eight and ten years of age, at least in my case, we begin to think more about what we were taught and slowly move toward independent thought and eventually our philosophy of life. I maintain that the epistemology of most humans is extremely narrow and what we know is both limited and limiting. It’s an interesting study to think about, how do we come to know what we know.

This morning I listened to the teaching of an old Bible teacher that I have been listening to, off and on, for at least forty years. As a child growing up in Los Angeles my Mom would regularly listen to Dr. J. Vernon McGee and his mid-day Thru The Bible broadcast (www.ttb.org). Dr. McGee has an unusual voice, which he described as a bit like Andy Griffith (an American television personality with a deep southern accent.), which can either be captivating because of his folksy presentation, or hokey and a bit grating to the ears. Perhaps it’s due to my southern roots that I find his tone engaging.

The two main reasons I have listened to McGee all these years is because, first, the program is built on a five-year verse-by-verse study of the Scriptures. Though topical sermons are helpful, they lack the holistic hermeneutics that expository teaching provides. I prefer learning what God has to say about finances, prayer, Divine intervention and prophecy through a holistic approach rather than picking one passage of Scripture in which to build a doctrine.

Secondly, Dr. McGee is a great storyteller. As I remind my students, context gives meaning and presenting real life applications, as illustrations, are the most effective way to teach any subject. Jesus was a great storyteller. J. Vernon’s teaching comes alive with his stories and illustration (granted, some of them are dated and a bit corny, but they are still interesting).

Over the years I have come to disagree with Dr. McGee and his interpretation on some doctrinal issues. He is from a Reformed tradition that makes him more of a determinists than I am. I’m pretty sure he would be less tolerant of a postmodernist that I have become. I confess, however, that Dr. J. Vernon McGee has shaped and influenced a part of my epistemology. I have come to know what I know about God through many influences, but none that has been more consistent than the teachings of a man from Texas who gave his life to teach Thru The Bible.

How do you come to know what you know? Who are the teachers who have guided you? What books have you read that have shaped your present day thinking? Happy is the person who learns from many and finds those few can guide them in consistently in their intellectual growth.

The Agony Of International Travel

Jetlag is more than a bit inconvenient; it’s painful.

We arrived back in the states Monday night after a grueling thirty-six hour journey. Most of the trip was sitting in airports (Delhi, Milan, Toronto, Atlanta) waiting for the next flight. After sitting on a plane for eight hours or more, it’s wonderful to stretch your legs and walk around the airport terminal. However, one can only look in the gifts-shops so long and you begin to wonder what you are going to do with the next two hours of the layover. Airport seating is rarely comfortable and all the time the body just wants to lie down. I passed my time looking at people, thanking God that I’m not the mother who has to corral three unruly kids, or grateful that I’m not (yet) the old man who is in the wheelchair and needs assistance to get on the plane.

In air travel there is a hierarchy of people I would prefer not sitting around me. The first is crying babies. I feel sorry for the tiny ones because their little eardrums hurt because of the cabin pressure or they are stuck in a portable crib. It’s not their fault the only way they can express their unhappiness is through crying…non-stop. Though I do feel for them, I don’t want to share their pain by listening to their misery throughout the flight.

The second group I don’t want in my seating area are teen-agers. They are actually louder than babies and much more unruly, ranging from irritating to rude. I realize I sound like an old fuddy-duddy, but it’s just embarrassing to see the ranging hormones of adolescents as they try to impress the person of the opposite sex through giggles, punches and horse-like sounds that is meant to be human laughter. With babies all you can do is plug your ears; with teen-agers I want to say, “Hey, shut-up…I’m trying to sleep!”

Ah, the joy of the first night to actually lie down on a bed. The mattress is what I might imagine floating on a cloud would be like. My body sinks into the mattress, not merely resting on top. My legs whisper a “thank you” that it can stretch without the weight of the rest of my body. My tush is so grateful that I can rest on my side or stomach through the night. I wake up in my new surroundings refreshed, ready to seize the day, my first day back in my home country.

By three o’clock in the afternoon my body begins to run out of steam and by four I’m stopped by the side of the road completely out of gas. I try to stay awake, but can’t and fall into stage number five REM, just slightly above comatose. Now it’s Wednesday, 2 a.m. and I’m wide awake. I will continue this pattern for another three days. Though painful I realize it’s the price I must pay in world travel. I figure the reason God created Wal-Mart was so I would have some place to walk around when my body is in the U.S., but my time clock is eleven and half hours on the other side of the world.

Authentic Status

The other day we had lunch with one of our friends. She is a very talented person, extremely gifted in organization. Recently she directed a school play, a musical on the Book of Esther. The reviews in the paper commented that it was so well done it could have been “professional” theater. Our friend is an accomplished vocalist and has been asked to direct a couple of concerts this year. She told us that when people ask her what she does she replies, “I’m a mom.”

This blog is not about motherhood or working women. I believe in both. My thoughts are about two other things, humility and status.

Unless you have spent much time in this culture you can’t really appreciate the importance of status in this society. Everyone is forever dropping names, offering their credentials, analyzing your name to determine your caste, examining your clothes to see where you rank socio-economically and even how fair your skin is to determine if you are from the north or south. Our friend has the pedigree, credentials and contacts that could really impress, if she was into that. In fact, if it wasn’t for her personality she could use all that status stuff to really be obnoxious. Instead of turning to a professional status, she says simply, “I’m a mom.”

People of this world system really don’t respect humble people. They see humility as weakness, maybe even false. I find our friend and her husband’s humility so wonderfully refreshing. Arrogance is such a trap and I feel it in my own life. I see it in others as well, who are obsessed with the things they buy or the house they live in. I know others who, in attempt to be humble, make sure everyone knows the sacrifices they are making. Our friend’s house is nice and very comfortable, but not extravagant. They dress well, but their wardrobe doesn’t scream, “Look at me.” (Actually, the husband is so laid back there may be times when he could ratchet it up a notch. But, that’s why we’re such good friends as I am a bit of a frump). Humility is a Christ-like character, as Jesus displayed humbleness from the cradle to the cross, yet He was the King.

What our friend’s have taught me is that one does not need to sell yourself to make it in this world. That is a Western capitalist free-market economy concept. My favorite verse is, “See a man [or mom] skilled their work? They will serve before kings, not serve before obscure men” (Proverbs 22:29). The Master told us the meek will inherit the earth (Matthew 5:5). Good reminders…do your work well and walk with humility. You won’t have to tell others how great you are, they will know it.

Mama Njeri

Last week Jecinta passed away. It came as a shock when I received the news from her husband, Paul, that she was in a Nairobi hospital after suffering a stroke. As I write this note her body is still in the morgue and won’t be released until the hospital bill of $8,500 is paid. In Kenya, bodies left in the morgue for long periods of time is not unusual. There was a politician whose body remained in the cooler for over a year until the dispute, between his wives, was resolved on where he would be buried.

Paul Gichuki was one of the first men who became a believer in our ministry in Kenya back in 1977. He became pastor of the church nine months after it was established. A couple of years later he and Jecinta got married. We always called her Mama Njeri, after their first child, Njeri, was born.

Jecinta was not an overly friendly person. While she was always kind to my family, and me, she wasn’t warm. She would sit and laugh and engage in discussion when she did sit down to visit, but it wasn’t natural for her. I think she was always shy around us, maybe a little intimidated.

Paul has been pastor of the Makutano Baptist Church for over 25 years. A bi-vocational pastor, Paul has been a farmer, a merchant, a Bible teacher, all at the same time. He and Jecinta, who are Kikuyu, were forced out of West Pokot District a few years back because of sectarian violence. Though he now lives thirty miles away from his church, several times each week Paul makes the trip to Makutano to lead his flock.

The Gichuki’s and Lewis’s are forever linked. Our children grew up together. Paul and I pioneered the work in West Pokot together. I buried his father in 1979 after Masai cattle raiders killed him. We watched four of his six grow before we left Kenya in 1989. Pastor Paul is one of the most deeply godly men I have ever met, so it does not come as a surprise to me that he has accepted Mama Nejeri’s early home-going as the Sovereignty of God. My prayer goes out to Paul. My thanks to all of you who have helped him financially and for those who are praying for him. Jecinta will be buried May 5th.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit" (Romans 15:3).

No, He Didn't Kiss The Bride

Another wedding, another experience. This one was the sister-in-law of my lawyer friend. I figured since he soaked me for legal services the least I could do was take advantage of the reception supper. I ate as much paneer, gosh, rice, fish, and roti as I could handle, but I’m still far from making a dent in my legal bill.

A mutual friend picked us up and we arrived at the church fifteen minutes early. Even our Indian friend wasn’t certain if the service would begin at the stated time of 5:30 p.m. The family are professionals, so there was a chance they would operate in “time orientation.” However, it was no real surprise to any of us that the bride began her walk down the aisle at 6:40. It’s a law here that one must be married or buried before sundown, so by the time we got to the “I now pronounce you…” they just got under the wire.

As the pastor cited the familiar phrase, “Do you promise to love and honor..” I wondered if the bride and groom would lie? Love? This union, like ninety percent of the marriages in this country, was arranged. After the relatives made the match, this young couple perhaps had a cup of coffee together to give a quick analysis on whether their parents had made a good choice. American speed dating has nothing on this society, how about speed engagements! A quick review of educational qualifications, and her willingness to immigrate to Canada and the deal is done. When will they learn to love one another? Maybe after a year, perhaps after their first child, maybe never. But they signed a contract, so the chances of them not honoring their vows are considerably less than the emotional drip ("But, daddy, I just loooove him so much") that is in my country.

There were more video cameras at this wedding than a Bush Rose Garden press conference. They even had one guy who was panning the congregation that was then projected on a screen in the front of the church. I felt like I was at the Texas Rangers stadium and when I saw my face was on the screen I had an incredible urge to wave and yell, “Look! It’s me! Hi mom!”

After the service the bride and groom stood on the steps of the church for photographs. About ten eunuchs (transvestites) showed up, clapping and being obnoxious. They show up at all weddings to harass the guests for money. Some Hindu’s believe they have the power to bless or curse so they would rather give into their demands than beat the crap out of them. (I have low tolerance for rudeness, whether it is a he, she or "I'm not sure?").

Five and half hours later, we made it home. We left very early so I am supposing the reception went on for another four hours. My comments reflect my “time” worldview. For this culture it was an “event,” which is to be enjoyed by all. And, no, when they were pronounced husband and wife, the groom lifted her veil but did not kiss the bride.

Be Transformed

This past month I taught at the South Asian Institute for Advanced Christian Studies (SAIACS). As a consultant I work in different training environments and SAIACS asked me to teach a doctoral class in cultural anthropology. As I’ve stated before, my training focus is with the people of the future, its leadership. Eight men, most of them holding significant positions in their own denominations or non-profit organization, were in this special class.

Because of time constraints and because of the makeup of the group, I did not teach my standard course. Instead, we had a one-week workshop analyzing their organizational workplace environment. Using anthropologist Mary Douglas’ grid and group social theory model (Cultural Bias 1982), they worked to identify if their organization were franchiser, bureaucratic, hierarchical or facilitator. I was not surprised with the outcome. Seven out of the eight work in a high grid/high group hierarchical work environment. The odd man out is a guy who has his own consulting business and he, like myself, works as a low grid/low group franchiser.



At the end of the analysis the question is always, “So what? What good is it?" That’s a bottom line question for everything we do in life. It’s one thing to understand what happens, it’s entirely a different matter to know why things happen and, even more importantly, what to do with the findings. So how does this workshop help in planting churches or reaching the world with the message of Christ? It’s through, as my friend Sherwood Lingenfelter (Transforming Culture 1998) says, finding transformation principles.

Organizations are often ineffective and inefficient because they function within the boundaries of their cultural prescriptions, but they do not operate with Kingdom principles. The organizations that are hierarchical are notoriously closed to outsiders, to innovation, as well as sound discipleship principles. There are no “ideal” or “biblical” structures, though Americans are forever trying to make other cultures operate as franchiser’s or facilitator’s, because that is how they function. All work place environments need Kingdom transformation if the goal is to grow and be an effective witness.

Confused? So were my students, at the beginning. But as they grew in their understanding of how systems work, they saw how God can use them and their work place environment for greater impact when they apply the scriptural principle, “Be not conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:2,3). As a cross-cultural worker my role is not to change culture or organizations, but help people see how they, corporately and individually, can be transformed to serve Him better. My belief is that when people and work place environments are transformed, the foundation for people movements and, ultimately the transformation of a nation, are in place.

Manager Wanted

For me, management is like art. I may not know how to create a masterpiece, but I know it when I see it.

I think the worse thing a company could do is hire me as a manager. To be a manager means being someone who can organize and coordinate. A manager is someone who can take the vision and make it function. As one who can conceptualize how it should be done, I can get it started, but if it’s going to be efficient in the long haul, it will need someone who can make the pieces fit. In the thirty years I have been in ministry I have started a number of projects including church planting among tribals, non-formal training programs in the US and in other countries. But in all that time I have never managed any program beyond its initial launch. I’ve given up more titles of responsibility than you can count…pastor, head of training in Kenya, Overseas Director, Asia Director, VP of Training, all were positions I held at one time. I gave them up because I know, as an entrepreneur, how to create, but I don’t have the gifts to manage it.

Miller, in his book Barbarians to Bureaucrats. Corporate Life Cycle Strategies: Lessons from the Rise and Fall of Civilizations, identifies well the differences between a leader and a manger:

"Managers must understand the difference between leadership and management. Leadership provides the vision, values, and purpose that creates motion. Management channels the energy leadership creates."

In America, there is usually a clear line between the visionary leader and management. This is not true in India. In Asia, the leader and the manager is all-in-one. Nine times out of ten institutions (be they business or church) are a high grid/high group hierarchal structure with those at the top of the extended family calling the shots. The problem is that those who are at the top many times don’t know how to manage anything and as a result the organization does not function well. It survives only because the core group of family isn’t going anywhere (look for another job or go to a different church), but it does not grow because outsiders are not included except for what they can provide to the group.

My wife and I have been attending a fellowship in the city for over two years. We go there primarily because the pastor is a marvelous expositor of the Word. We attend church, not to have an emotional encounter, but to be spiritually fed. However, attending this church is often an exercise in frustration as the service, prior to the preaching, is an excruciating experience. The worship team doesn’t know how to lead the congregation in singing, most of the time the tech team can’t get the choruses on the overhead screen, microphones squeal, offering is a last minute scramble to find the offering baskets and ushers to pass the plate. If the pastor is out of town, which is often, the substitute speaker is woefully inadequate in his presentation. We continue to attend this fellowship because of the friendships we have built and for what it is, in spite of what it isn't. Because of our commitment to the assembly, we support its purpose, but are saddened by its loss of potential. With a little management, it could be more effective and has the prospect of having even more of an impact in the community.

Apart from this blog, which I am certain no one in the congregation will read, I would not, I cannot, give suggestions on how to do things better. Why? Because in a high grid/high group social environment it’s extremely difficult for change to take place and besides, as an outsider, I have no role.

Our local church is just one example of the how organizations operate in this country. If we went to another fellowship it would likely have the same structure. I am not suggesting that the high grid/high group structure is inherently wrong nor that the low grid structures are superior (explanation in the next blog). However, those in the West, who hope to do business or ministry in this country, need to understand that things work here based on the hierarchical (chief, extended family) system. If it works well it’s because the hierarchy possess both vision and management gifts. It’s a rare combination indeed.

Death and Resurrection

I was told I could get a really good hamburger in Bangalore. I even had a friend in the states who wrote and said it was a treat, on him! Can’t beat a deal like that. But alas, it never happened. The reason, Raj Kumar passed away and the whole city shut down, even the five star hotels where I was to go for my treasured beef between the bun.

Rajkumar was an old time movie star from the area, a poor kid who made it big on the silver screen. As many of you know, India makes more movies, I think an average of three a day, than any place in the world. Bollywood (from Bombay) stars are not just admired, they are worshipped, and so it was with Mr. Rajkumar. The day he died until they buried (not cremated) him the next day, there were riots in the street with over 100 vehicles burned and at least eight people killed.

We were in Kenya when we heard that Elvis died. An American friend of ours cried that day in 1977, and was in mourning for a period of time after that. Even today, Graceland is visited by thousands each year. I would suppose that some even pray at the grave of Elvis as it is some kind of a spiritual experience. In this country, where almost everything can be considered a diety, Rajkumar's death was, for some, a loss of a demigod. The riots, in reality, was more political than anything else, giving people a reason to vent their frustrations at the local government.

I didn’t mind not getting my hamburger, it wasn’t that important. I am saddened, however, with the misplaced devotion of people to a man who, like us, was just human. Yesterday, Christians around the world remembered the Son of Man who was like no other who has ever lived on this earth, and His death 2,000 years ago. Sunday, we will remember again that He conquered death and rose from the grave. To those who have put their faith in Him, we, too, will one day live again. Our hope is not in a movie star, a prophet or guru, our hope remains in Christ.

Spiritual DNA

This week my wife and I are in Bangalore. It’s a nice break from Delhi, though surprisingly the temperature here is the same as in the north. In spite of the summer heat, the one thing that we revel in is the quiet of the campus. We can actually hear birds singing and when they sleep through the night, there is not a sound.

Everyone needs physical refreshment. Though this setting is not a resort and I still have to teach six hours each day, it’s a time where the change of scenery is as welcome as a day on the beach. We end our day with an evening walk, perhaps watch a movie on our computer, or just read. Sandy found a delightful autobiography of Essie Summers and we are now both trying to finish it before the end of the week. Essie, married to a minister, was a romance fiction writer and, from what I read by searching for her on Google, was quite well known. As a guy, who has not, nor ever will read a romance novel, of course I’ve never heard of her. My interest in her is the life she lived as a writer in New Zealand in the ‘50’s until her death in 1998.

My thoughts are on all the people who have graced this earth in the nearly sixty years since I arrived; the people who once lived, who shared this planet with me for a brief period of time; for those who are now gone or who presently share this globe with me who are in physical and spiritual formation. As The Preacher writes in Proverbs, "man’s days are like a shadow, like a vapor." And yet, within this brief moment we call life, God is touching the lives of people who will touch the lives of others, maybe even my own. I believe heaven will be fascinating, as we will have eternity to map our spiritual DNA. That person who lived a thousand years ago who, whether peasant of king, gave birth to a witness who, over the centuries, lived and gave witness to another, which eventually led to that event in a little Baptist Church in Gardena, California where I accepted Christ as my Savior.

Our lives are unique and not, as the Hindu believe, a repeat of a former life. My creation was no accident, as the humanist would suppose. Created for Him, my arrival into the Kingdom will be due to those that preceded me. Who are these people that not only shared this planet with me, but whose existence had direct impact on mine? When time is no more I will learn that my spiritual “kin” were noble and ignoble, rich as well as poor, righteous as well as wicked. My spiritual lineage will be much more interesting than my family lineage, I am certain. I look forward to meeting those who lived their lives in submission to Christ and because of their faithfulness they had eternal significance on my soul. I pray that I, too, will have such significance and perhaps in eternity someone will come up to me and reveal that my presence on earth was a link to their salvation. Could there be a greater reward?

Organizational Failure

Last December (12/22 post) I predicted that Jimmy would quit the team. I learned this past week that, indeed, Jimmy and his wife were on their way home after only four months on the field. I have little first hand knowledge of the details, but I’ve been around long enough to read the tea leaves.

Jimmy and Joline (obviously not their real names) were setup to fail. They had their first child three months before their arrival and, because they are first time parents in their early 40’s, this miracle child became the center of their world. Nothing wrong with that, every parent should feel their family is the most valued possession God has given them. Jimmy wanted to wait for another few months to come over, but the organization insisted they get to their field immediatley. They arrived at the worse possible time of the year as the weather is atrocious in December. They had to immediately find an apartment, buy furniture and enter language school. All the time Joline is hating every minute, probably hating Jimmy for dragging her to a place she did not want to be. It’s my guess that it isn’t this country that’s the problem, any field would have been every bit as unacceptable.

Jimmy and Joline will now go to counseling for a month to assess their situation. After a month they will make their decision on whether to return or not. I’m not a prophet nor a counselor, but my guess is that the therapist will suggest they not return. I am certain counseling will be helpful, but the counseling is partly a face-saving measure for J and J, but mostly for the organization ("we did everything to help them"), before they resign.

I got into the business of training people for overseas work because of people like Jimmy and Joline, so I am obviously interested in the why people who do not make it on the field. I do not believe this couple are victims and they indeed bear some of the responsibility for leaving the field. Before they moved here they had made a short-term visit and seemed excited to live here, though I doubt that Joline was as excited about it as was Jimmy. After the baby was born everything changed, and this is where I believe the organization failed this couple.

When situations change it’s important for all parties to recognize it and be honest. J and J probably should have been asked to reevaluate their “calling” when they found out that Joline was pregnant. If J and J insisted they still wanted to be fielded, the organization should have done one of two things. One would have been to say to them they would not be fielded for another six months to a year. This is what J and J wanted, but they were denied. The other option would have been just to tell them that their situation had changed so much they would not be fielded. This is tougher, but someone needs to have the courage to say no to people rather than try to hope for the best.

Discernment is a rare gift. An even greater gift is having discernment and then making the hard decisions. Jimmy and Joline had little chance of succeeding on the field, the leadership knew it before they got on the plane.

My guess is that, in time, J and J will be fine once they get back to the states and settle into the surroundings they are both comfortable with. They will for years carry the stigma of a couple who raised a lot of money to get to the field but didn’t last. I’m sorry for that, because it didn’t have to happen. Some people are just not cut out to live overseas. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. The greater issue is the process of their failure. I hope the organization will not scapegoat this incident and take a hard look on how to do things better, for the sake of people, for the sake of Christ and His work.

Book Review

I finished reading The Namesake while in Chennai on a teaching assignment. About the only time I can read a novel is when I am on the road. To read non-fiction at any other time seems to be a violation of time stewardship.

Sandy, my wife, who is a ferocious reader, consumed the first 75 pages before I left town. She said the character wasn’t interesting and she couldn’t get into it. Our friend Sharmila, who read it while in Japan, also said she didn’t care for the book as the author, Jhumpa Lahiri, was too detailed which distracted from the story. With “two thumbs down” you’d think I would have abandoned the project, but hey, I was going to be alone in my room for two weeks with nothing else to do, so why not?

As a student of culture, I enjoyed The Namesake. It’s a story about a Bengali family from Calcutta who moves to the U.S. in the ‘50’s and the struggles they faced as new immigrants. The main character is Gogol, their son, who was given this “good name” at birth. It was only meant to be a pet name until their grandmother in India sent his real name. That name was somehow lost crossing the Atlantic and the boy lives with Gogol until he is old enough to change it himself. The name Gogol is neither Indian nor American, but Russian, named after Nikolay Gogol (1809-1852), the Russian novelist, dramatist, satirist, founder of the so-called critical realism in Russian literature.

Lahiri’s book was interesting as it gives insights on how people from India cope with living overseas. They, like all immigrants, usually group together in ethnic coalitions rather than integrate into the larger society. This is still very much the practice today with most immigrants, especially with Indians who are more group oriented than individualistic American's living overseas. I found the main character, though hardly endearing, a fascinating study of “third culture kids” (TCK). Indian on the outside, mostly American on the inside, Gogol, like all TCK’s, struggles to find his true identity. Had the story continued, Gogol’s children would probably have embraced the culture of their grandparents, wanting to identify with their “roots.”

I have not read enough Indian novels to make judgment, but the few I have read all leave me thinking about one word…fatalism. Fatalism permeates the Hindu worldview. Why do peasants accept their life with resignation? It’s fate, there is nothing one can do about it. Why does the caste system, where a persons lot in life is predetermined, continue to prevail in this society? Their belief in dharma, that all creation must adhere to a sense of obligation and must fulfill his role in society, even as an outcast, somehow makes the pain of life bearable, though meaningless. As I read the last lines of this novel it left me neither happy nor sad, neither gratified nor disappointed. It just ended -- like life.

For an outsider wanting to learn the inner workings of culture, The Namesake is worth the read. If you’re looking for a Bollywood ending, I suggest you buy a copy of Hum Tum on DVD.

Justification of Role

Every one justifies what they do. So, when my friend asked me last week in Serbia if I believed the day of North American missionary was over, my answer was probably self-serving. There is no question that what I did thirty years ago in Kenya isn’t what I would do today. Yet, there are many people still going to Kenya, and other places in the world, doing ministry that the national church should, and indeed are doing. I’m not sure there is any place in the world, where there is a strong Christian presence, that requires Americans to be involved in hands-on church planting. My self-serving belief is that Westerners should only be going to the field to be a resource for the national church. To be a good resource one should have the gifts and expertise to add value for what God is already doing throughout the world.

“The problem I see,” I continued, “is that mission organizations continue to send people to the field to either do pioneer work or as facilitators for the national church though they have no gifts in those areas of need.”

“If that’s, true,” he asked, “Why do agencies continue to send them?”

“It’s a combination of things. First, and foremost, the American church wants to be involved in global outreach. This is right and noble, even if it’s not always effective. Secondly, [admittedly a more sinister and uncharitable opinion] it’s an economic issue,” I replied. “With each support dollar a missionary raises the organization siphons off between 12 to 25 cents. Missions has become a business. Mission organizations don’t recruit people for a task; they recruit them to be a part of the grand scheme of world evangelization whether they have gifts for the task or not. If people were recruited for a specialized task, half of those on the field would have to come home. But everyone feels their job is essential because everyone justifies what they do.”

While this is true of faith organizations, which rely on field people for their operating budget, it is no less true of large organizations that have salaried personnel. I’m always amazed with those denominations that have tons of money but don’t seem to be any more effective than the mom-and-pop groups. I’ve met some of these salaried people who are as lost on what they should be doing as the independent franchisers.

If we recruited people for a task two things would happen. First, those serving overseas will be people with special and proven skills. Whether that skill is helping in organizational management, teaching (specialized subjects) or assisting in social development programs (micro-business enterprises, facilitating global English-medium based projects, etc.), a focused task skill will always be in demand. The numbers for such people are significant, though not enormous, which leads to the second development for task (purpose) driven missions – fewer people on the field and the death of many missionary-sending agencies.

Will there come a time when there will never be a role for Western missionaries? No. Because we are a part of the Body of Christ worldwide, we will always have a function. And, our role should certainly be more than just funding nationals. But to serve as an essential component of the Body, we need to continue to define what is our greatest contribution. Those of us who understand our role will always have a part to play, but then again, everyone justifies what they do.

Samsung Field Internship

Recently I received an email from Brian, a Korean who recently moved to our city. Brian is a Christian and wanted to find a church to attend so my wife and I asked him to join us. After services we had lunch and he told us his story.

Brian is a PK (preachers kid) who works for Samsung. His company sent he and twenty-two other Koreans to live one year and do research in this culture on business practices. Though Brian is married with two children, they did not come with him to the country. The structure of Brian’s one-year internship is not well defined, though he is expected to send reports to Samsung regularly on what he is learning. After this internship he may return to this country as one of their overseas managers, though that is not guaranteed.

As a trainer in cross-cultural studies I, of course, was interested in this program. At first blush I observed a few things that was both positive and negative in this internship model. On the positive side, I liked the idea that Samsung has sent people out to ask questions first, rather than coming with a market assumption. This is a continual drumbeat for me -- ask the questions before giving the answers. Too many times in businesses, including church business, there is a focus on selling the product before even knowing if the product has a market.

I’ve told this story before, but before I moved to Asia I spent a good deal of time visiting leaders to learn what the need was. I believe what I do is vital, but I wasn’t sure (a) if anyone else saw “my product” as important and, (b) if there was anyone else already here providing the same service as I do. No need to sell a product that is not needed or try to sell something to an already saturated market. If the church and missions would follow this model, I believe our work would be more effective.

The other thing I liked about Samsung’s approach was that they made it clear that, though twenty-two came over together, they were to live and work separately. After one year it will be interesting to analyze the notes of each intern. What are the common experiences? Who did well and why? Who did not do well, and why? What did each of them learn about the culture and how can they use that information for the benefit of the company?

Living separately also insures that the participants actually lean on the host culture or other expat business people for their cultural discovery, not just from their own cultural group.

The fact that the family is not involved in this project is both a strength and a weakness. It’s a strength in that the husband can focus on the job he was sent to do and not be consumed with making the family comfortable. New people coming to the field spend half, or more, of their first term dealing family adjustments (housing, schooling, etc.). The weakness in this approach is that if Brain is assigned to this country after the internship there is no guarantee that his wife and kids will adjust. Companies of every business suffer with attrition because the family cannot cope in an overseas environment. What the Korean family has over American family is the extended family structure. Brain’s family lives with his parents and is well taken care of, but that doesn’t mean that his wife will adjust to an overseas environment.

The major weakness of the program is that Samsung did not provide ANY pre-field training before sending this group on their internship. So, basically, these people are trying to discover the answers without having an idea of what questions to ask. Even a one week intensive on cultural anthropology designed to help people think about what to look for in another culture would enrich their internship tremendously. To send people to find their own way is a huge flaw in strategy.

Brian will probably do well. I think Samsung will be happy with this man’s work as he is mature and seems to have a well thought out plan for what he will be doing for a year. I would encourage all businesses, and especially those involved in Kingdom business, to think about how to better prepare people for cross-cultural work.

Family Title

When Becky, our oldest daughter, was pregnant with their first child she asked me what I wanted my grandchildren to call me?

“Anything but something stupid,” I answered. “I don’t want them to call me ‘pee-paw’ or ‘boo-boo’ or ‘big-daddy.’”

I thought Your Excellence had a nice ring, but no one bought it.

It was about that time I received my Doctorate in Intercultural Studies, so she came up with Doc. Not bad. A little more human than I envisioned, but I could live with it.

Recently my extremely lovely, talented and gifted grandkids were together in North Carolina and found this ice cream store. Pictured are Molly, holding cousin Simon, next to cousin Isabella and brother Colin on the far right.

Names are important. One should take care in receiving their paternal consanguine name as their “good name.” Your Imminence would have been nice, but I’m proud to be just Doc.

Taco Bell Says...

My flight from Belgrade to Milan had mechanical problems so 20 minutes after take off we turned around and made our way back to point of departure. I sat for two hours in a dingy and uncomfortable waiting room before Alitalia called to tell me I was going to miss my connecting flight to Delhi. After collecting my bag and going to the Alitalia office the lady at the desk asked me if I wanted the same flight for the next day.

“Yes,” I replied, “but I would prefer you get to me to Milan today. Get me a hotel there tonight and I will continue my journey tomorrow.”

“Oh, I can’t do that,” she said, “As your flight has not yet been cancelled.”

“So, you can’t get me to Milan to get my connecting flight and you can’t give me a hotel because officially it isn't canceled? So what should I do, wait another five hours before you do cancel the flight so I can get a room?”

Eventually they put me on a Lufthansa flight and I arrived in Delhi the next day. I thought about the events of this journey and how interesting standard operating procedures prohibit people from thinking rationally. I realize procedures are put into place for a purpose, but procedures, sometimes, confine people inside a process box that does not allow them to logically view problems and seek alternatives. You would think that there would be training, especially in customer service, that would help employees solve problems whether it is within procedure or not. Here are some training tips on how to help employees think outside the grid of rules and regulations.

1. Your First Responsibility is to Solve The Problem - If the predicament is the company’s fault, the representative for the company should be trained to solve the customer’s problem? The lady at the Alitalia service(?) counter would have been happy to book me for the next day’s flight, if I paid for my own hotel room. She was trained to follow procedure, not helping me, the paying customer, to rectify a situation that was clearly the fault of the airline.

2. Problem Solving Is Profitable - Solving problems for the customer, in the long run, will add to the bottom line, not detract from it. I suspect Alitalia was trying to save a few bucks by not paying for a room to keep me that night. I’m not sure how they come out better by passing me off to Lufthansa but, it seemed apparent to me the lady was trained to think about how to save the company money, not how to help the customer. When a company has that mentality it shouldn’t come as a surprise when they loose market-share. Next time perhaps I will simply book on Lufthansa as I am not sure Alitalia will help me in a pinch. If the company would have solved my problem it is a company I am more likely to want to do business with in the future. If I have to solve problems created by others, I will find another travel option.

3. Take Responsibility - After two hours standing around in an stuffy lounge, the natives were getting restless. When people asked those at the desk for information, i.e., what is the estimated time we might continue our journey; who will help with the connecting flights? those with the walkie-talkies and badges merely shrugged their shoulders and said, “I’m not in charge.” Hey, we don’t want you to be in charge, but since you do work here it would be nice for someone to say, “I’m not in charge, but I will find the person who can and will help.” Maybe they won’t be any more helpful than the lady behind the customer service (?) desk, but, as Taco Bells says, think outside the bun -- take responsibility. It’s called taking initiative, which seems to be lacking in customer service training.

The good news is I made it home with just a 10-hour delay. Through it all I never lost my temper, was never rude and didn’t act like an idiot, which is more than I can say for some of my fellow passengers. It does no good to burst a blood vessel when things go wrong, especially when it's things out of my control. My outlet is this blog, which few people will read. But, who knows, maybe someone from Alitalia or someone else in customer service will stumble across it will and be of help. Either way, I’ve got it off my chest. Blogging can be so therapeutic.

Back Home

I just returned from a five-day trip to Belgrade where I taught church leaders from Serbia, Albania, Macedonia, Romania, Hungary and Bulgaria. The challenges of ministry in Eastern Europe are immense, but God is working through some very faithful leaders.

It’s ironic that I was in Serbia while the funeral of Slobodan Milosevic was taking place. Milosevic single handedly destroyed that country in his attempt the make the former Yugoslavia into a greater Serbia. He was in the Hague for war crimes against humanity when he died of a heart attack. The funeral drew many supporters, but for most of the Serbian people the week’s events was just a reminder of a painful period in their life and were anxious to get him buried so they could move on in life.

While in the airport I saw Ramsey Clark. Clark was once a defense lawyer for Milosevic but took time away from his present client, Saddam Hussein, to attend an old friends funeral. Of course Clark wasn’t the only Communist present, as the airport was full of Red supporters from Russia and other eastern block countries. Absent from the funeral was Slobodan’s wife and son, who have arrest warrants out for them which kept them in Russia where they are in exile.

It will take me a couple of days to collect my thoughts and reflect on my time in Serbia, but the contrast between meeting with men and women of God who are trying to be a positive influence in the region to that of the Balkan Butcher, couldn’t have been greater. I’m grateful that my life work is around people who are messengers of life rather than those who seek to destroy it. We are not seeking a greater Serbia, Russia or even the United States; our focus is on a greater Kingdom that is not built through ethnic cleansing, but a cleansing that comes through the cross.

Noise Pollution

A friend from the states called me on Skype this morning. He asked, “Where are you? I hear dogs barking and horns honking?

Delhi is one loud place. We live in an average neighborhood that is not near a highway, but from sun-up to sun-down we are off the racket-o-meter with NOISE. In the early morning it’s hawkers pushing their carts selling fruit, vegetables, brooms, carpets, manure and potted plants. Along with them are guys who ride up and down the lane on bicycles yelling out their services as plumbers, electricians, shoe repairman and carpenters. The streets are narrow and the voices of those yelling bounce off the three story concrete buildings.

While all this is going on, there is the traffic. The auto-rickshaws are not much more than lawn mower engines, so you can imagine what they sound like going up and down the neighborhood. There is the occasional truck, motorcycles, cars, all with their hands firmly on the horn if not the steering wheel. About every-other-day air traffic control diverts incoming flight over our house and as they make their approach we can read the fine print on the belly of the plane.

Did you know that the word noise comes from the Latin word nausea? I looked up noise pollution and found that it has an effect on the health and behavior of people causing a rise in blood pressure as well as vasoconstriction leading to the increase of coronary artery disease. There are also potential adverse effects on sexual desire and performance. Yep, noise pollution is a serious matter.

My friend Lloyd Kwast use to pray, “Lord, today we will hear a thousand voices...may we hear yours.” Yes, Lord, I want to hear your voice over the noise clutter of the city, but if you won’t do talk to me, would you at least grant me a half hour of quiet for a nap?

I'm Software

What would you suppose is more important for the operation of a computer, the hardware or the software? A little like which came first, the shell or the feathers, isn’t it? The answer, of course, is that both are equally important. A computer is not a computer without the chip, screen and keyboard. But without the spreadsheet, word processor and OS program, the computer is just a shiny thing on your desk without purpose.

In spite of that obvious truth there seems to be in the business world, and especially in the religious world, a greater emphasis on the hardware than software. People like to support building projects, feeding programs, schools for orphans, and halfway houses for those on the way to recovery. Why? Because it’s tangible, something they can see, take a pictures of, even write to (the child one sponsor’s for $10 a month, or the national evangelist for $20 a month). It’s all good. Part of God’s equation in bringing people to himself is those involved in hardware ministry.

Software developers are not nearly as popular, but they are no less important. Those involved in software work range from administrators to consultants. Software makes the hardware function and without it it's merely a ministry that drains resources but doesn’t really produce anything of Kingdom value.

The worth of software depends on its function. I can’t imagine trying to write without a program that doesn’t have a spell checker, font options or has the capacity to move text around. Good software provides a helping hand. If it doesn’t make my job easier then I don’t need it.

When I got my first computer, back in 1984 (which I still have, a Kaypro II with its awesome power of 64K memory, pictured above), software was bulky, but so was the computer. As I upgraded (going to a Mac and never looking back) I use to put all type of junk on my computer. I had so many bells and whistles that it talked and giggled every time I turned it on, off or made a mistake. Much older and wiser now, I put nothing on my hard-drive except for what I absolutely need. Software is not something to collect, it’s something to use.

When I lived in Kenya I started out in the hardware business. I built churches, schools and operated feeding programs. There’s good money in hardware (obviously not my motivation) and people loved to buy bricks for the glory of God. Later I switched to software and wrote lessons for our institute. Twenty years later, I’m still in the software business.

There are tons of generic software programs on the market today -- leadership, interpersonal relationships, evangelism and discipleship seminars. Those who sell these products are usually mono-cultural common brands that one pulls off the shelf in Colorado Springs and teach in Calcutta. It’s all good. It’s all part of God’s equation in bringing people to Himself.

My software is not a big seller, though I believe it’s one of the most important programs on the market (of course I would say that!). There are not many of us who teach people how to effectively communicate the message to people of different ethnic, socio-economic or cultural backgrounds; how to take what is taught and apply it to real life situations. Businesses, non-profits, institutions, even the military and governments would benefit from this software product as it helps people think about others and their needs. When one understands their market, they are better able to sell their product, whether that is an ideology, policy or the latest computer.

I’m grateful for those who deal in hardware. Those of us who are in software know that to make that machine work efficiently our work is equally important. We may not be the sexiest thing on the market, but without us, you can’t even boot up.

Language Study

Raise your hands if you’ve heard this one before.

A person who speaks three languages is…trilingual
A person who speaks two languages is…bilingual.
A person who speaks only one language is…AMERICAN!

For structuralist, anthropologists who look for the patterns of structure when studying culture, there is no more important organized pattern in society than that of language. Language is the ordering of the mind. How one sees their world is determined by how they think. The vocabulary of a person’s culture reflects not only their worldview but also their values. Example: The Eskimo’s have hundreds of words for “snow” because the white stuff is an integral part of their being. The Pokot, the tribe I worked with in Kenya, has no words for snow as it is not a part of their world. They do have, however, hundreds of cattle word terms. Pastoralists need these words not only to communicate but to express value.

I tell students to learn language well when entering another country. To know the worldview of others is to know the heart of who they are and that is reflected in culture.

I also tell my class to learn the language in which they are going to work. If one has targeted the Malinke of Mali, don’t waste your time on learning French. Though it is the official language of the country, unless you will be working among the elite of Bamako, learn the language of the common man. Most Malinke don’t know French, so learn Bambara, which is the trade language.

As a consultant and teacher living in southeast Asia, I have made a conscious choice to work only with those who know English. This is not a small group, in fact there are more English speakers here than in the U.S. and the U.K. combined (granted many of them do not speak it fluently, but they are still not the people I work with on a daily basis). My focus are on the future leaders of the country, those who will influence every segment of society. At my age to concentrate on learning another language I will never teach in is a waste of my time and energy and not strategic. As, I have frequently quoted, “Good strategy ends up being defeated by bad management.” This is true of time management as well. Like everyone, I cannot do everything that needs to be done, so I concentrate on those things I can do and don’t waste time doing things that’s not the best use of my time or talent.

Because I am bilingual I know how difficult learning language can be. Learning language is essential and should command one’s full attention. To avoid wasting time, learn what you need know, use what you learn, but learn only the language that you can effectively use.

The Kingdom of God and Hamburgers

I am neither Buddhist nor Hindu, but if I believed in reincarnation then surely my former life was that of Wimpy J. Wellington. It was Wimpy who uttered the immortal words; “I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.” I love hamburgers and consider myself quite a connoisseur of the beef patty between the bun. Mayo on the side, absolutely no ketchup or mustard, with cheese, please.

So this week I’m in Chennai and someone asks, “Have you been to Sparky’s? It’s worth visiting.”

I intended to just get a salad, trying to get my weight under control, but then I saw it on the menu…hamburger and fries. I was skeptical as this is not beef country. I have never had a good hamburger in India, not even in a five star hotel, as the beef is not Angus but water buffalo. But alas, I couldn’t resist.

On the burger scale, the worse being 1 and best 10, the Sparky burger was 3.5 -- the fries counting for the half point bump. You just can’t make buffalo taste like good old USDA ground round. The bun, also key for quality taste, was a bit doughy.

In spite of the burger bust, I give the restaurant a solid 10 for atmosphere and purpose. For an American living overseas there is nothing like being in a home atmosphere. At Sparky’s there are license plates from every state in the union, banners of US colleges, classic Rock-N-Roll music, lots of nostalgia Americanism on the walls. They tell me the owner has been shopping on eBay for four years to decorate his diner. As for purpose, the guy who started the eatery is with an outreach organization. All profits above cost from this highly successful enterprise goes into funding orphanages and youth programs.

Most serious Christian businessmen I’ve met see their function in the Body of Christ in a support role. They don’t see themselves as church planters, teachers or social workers. Rather, they recognize the importance of their gifts in business to help others who have that calling to accomplish their task. Different from non-Christian businessmen, whose focus is only about making money and taking care of their families, these unique, and surprisingly few, people are focused on using their talents to support the Kingdom as well as their own.

There are many things a person can do overseas that does not require them to understand Greek, Hebrew or know the meaning of soteriology. While you’re waiting on a call from God, how about just doing something you’re gifted in, like being a chef, starting a computer business or a health club. Nothing wrong with being salt and light while at the same time working alongside those have taken on the Kingdom business as a fulltime profession. Life does not end or begin at the doors of a seminary; it may be as close as the entrance of a hamburger joint.

I hope to get back to Sparky’s and try their most popular menu item, according to one of the waitresses, chicken fried steak. I guess if you add enough gravy it makes the buffalo taste better. I want to meet the owner. You can’t go wrong with a guy whose motto on the door reads, “Never Trust A Skinny Chef.”

Ethnocentrism

In my lectures in anthropology I talk about the curse of ethnocentrism. To be ethoncentristic is to have an attitude that one’s own culture is superior to others. It was a word developed around the Victorian age of colonialism, whereas cultures were classified as civilized or primitive by the criterion of how people lived, Europe being the highest standard of civilization.

Ethnocentrism manifest’s itself in subtle ways by making snide and unkind remarks about other people, e.g. they are stupid, lazy or dirty. A friend in Kenya use to say, when frustrated with the way things worked (or didn’t), “TIK” (This Is Kenya). In India one American family says, when they are stressed out, “We’re having an Indian culture day today.” One guy I know tells storeowners if they want his business they should meet his expectations as an American! It was in 1958 that the book The Ugly American was published…it’s a book about ethnocentrism and this pejorative term is still used today when American arrogance is displayed.

Ethnocentrism is not just a Western characteristic; it’s true of all cultures. "Skin tax" is common in developing countries where there are always two prices for every commodity, one for locals and one for foreigners. A popular book presently in India entitled One Night At A Call Center, is full of wisecracks about ignorant Americans. The kids working at the call center have come up with an IQ formula they call the 10 = 35 (the mentality of a 10 year old Indian equals the IQ of a 35 year old American). There is even a pastor of a church my wife attends for a women’s Bible study class who chides the Indian women by asking them, “Why do you want to be around these white skinned people?” Ethnocentrism is an insidious disease that affects all people in every culture.

Certainly people should be proud of their cultural heritage. I get weary listening to Americans apologize for their country; our policies, wealth, inequalities, etc. If something goes wrong in the world we can always blame the United States. Though my culture (and your culture), indeed have flaws, there is nothing inherently wrong with being proud of who you are and where you are from. We cross the line into ethnocentrism, however, when we begin to act out a spirit of superiority and voice that attitude with rude remarks about others.

I was reminded of this issue this past week. I purchased some airline tickets that were issued in the states. A friend said his father-in-law would bring the tickets for me when they come for a visit next month. I got a message from him Friday saying, “Sorry but they have lost the tickets.” I now have to go through the process of time and money in getting the tickets reissued. Hey, I understand, mistakes happen, we are all fallible. But I wondered, if someone in India had made this blunder, would we say it was just a mistake, or would we talk about the irresponsibility of the people in this culture? To err is human, unless you are of a different ethnicity and then you’re just an idiot.

I must admit I’m fighting ethnocentrism right now. As I think of the hours I’m going to have to put into correcting the goof-up of someone else, I know I should be charitable and say, “It could happen to anyone, everyone makes mistakes.” But in my black heart what I’m feeling is “the incompetent don’t live in Kenya or India, but in Texas.”

Friends and Enemies

Talking with a colleague several years ago, he mentioned a person whom I had business with. In the course of the conversation he let it be known that he did not have a good relationship with this mutual acquaintance. When I told him that, not only did I know this person, he was a friend of mine and wondered if that was a problem with us working together? He said to me, “Lewis, you don’t have to adopt my enemies to be my friend.”

I thought about that in my early morning walk today in Chennai. I have a friend here I have been working with for over ten years. He’s a visionary, charismatic and opinionated. He is also obstinate, a bit preachy and I certainly don’t agree with some of his projects. I have known people who have partnered with my friend who decided that he was either dishonest or a dictatorial tyrant and therefore severed their relationship with him. Many of those people wonder why I continue my relationship with such a man. The reasons are basic.

First, people who develop relationships based on competing agenda’s are bound to clash. When everyone wants to take the credit for how many souls are saved, how many churches are planted, how many orphans are supported, someone is going to be unhappy on how the money is or should be spent. My friend and I do not have competing agenda’s. His goals and mine are the same, i.e. training people how to take the message of Christ cross-culturally. Neither he nor I use each other for our own end. Because his goals and mine are the same we are not in competition.

Second, most people who work my friend do not understand culture. Indian’s do not, for the most part, operate in an egalitarian fashion. Family businesses function with a very strong sense of hierarchy. Roles are well defined and few people get a vote on how the organization is run. I don’t make the rules; I just know how the rules are created which most people from the outside fail to understand. If someone wants to work with people in this culture they must understand that the person at the top is in control and to try and make them “accountable” (as they define accountability) is a waste of time. (Hierarchy is usually the result of a family run business. For established business and schools that is not run by the founder or his sons, the structure is more bureaucratic. There are egalitarian companies in India, but they are the minority).

Lastly, the reason I continue to work with my friend is that I do not desire to adopt someone else’s enemies for their approval. In every relationship it is a matter of give-and-take. Certainly that is true in marriage, so is it with all friendships. I know the parameters in which I can work with my friend. I work with him; I do not work for him. When I am on his turf I operate by his rules. When I disagree with him, which is often, we discuss it. We have built a mutual respect for each other in spite of our differences in opinion or personality.

As I continued my walk I thought about my younger brother who has made a mess of his family because he insists that one must adopt his enemies to be his friend. Others in the family have embraced that same philosophy making it impossible for reconciliation. I thought about church members who, not only left a church over a disagreement, have broken relationships with those of their former church because they are unwilling to support their unhappy position. I thought about people in my life that I no longer have a relationship with because I refuse to adopt their enemies. Life is too short. I may not like your friends, but you don’t have to adopt my enemies to be a friend of mine.

Conflict and Cultures

I am presently reading The Argumentative Indian, by Amartya Sen. He begins,

“Prolixity is not alien to us in India. We are able to talk at some length. Krishna Menon (when he was leading the Indian delegation) holds the longest speech ever delivered in the United Nations (nine hours non-stop), established half a century ago and, has not been equaled by anyone from any where. We do like to speak.”

I thought about Sen’s book while in the bank the other day. Sure, one gets use to the talking, arguing, bartering in the bazaar, but the bank? I was amused as I listened to the complaints by customers and the defense by the employees. Then I thought about my own culture and how that, when it comes to money, or frustrated with poor service, we can get more than a bit testy as well. I guess it’s true of all cultures. Or is it?

Cultures are usually put into one of two categories, conflict or shame. Shame cultures are often thought to be primarily among peoples of the Far East -- China, Japan, Thailand, etc. It’s not that they don’t argue, they can and they do. However, especially as it relates to interpersonal relationships, they are less confrontational. The best way to handle conflict in those cultures is through third party mediation.

Southeast Asian countries of India, Pakistan, and the Middle East are conflict cultures. One does not need a reason to argue in these societies; even the daily buying of bread is enough for debate. Latin American’s are not passive in their interactions so they, too, would be in the conflict group, but not as much as in Southeast Asia.

In some parts of the Western Europe, tolerance often means no opinion, but one would still not classify them as a shame culture -- perhaps a milk toast combination depending on the situation. American’s can be in-your-face and they lend more toward conflict, though not as severe as the Middle East. I am certain the kids working in the call centers of Mumbai would disagree with my accommodating assessment, but dealing with people who get unsolicited telemarketing calls is not a true gauge of society.

As one looks at confrontation and culture it’s easy to see the transference of religious belief and behavior. (Is religion born out of culture, or is cultural behavior shaped by religion?) The cultures of Buddhism and Shintoism hold humility as a value. While in Korea recently I observed that even among Christian’s, the Shinto approach to life is adopted by everyone in society. Confrontation is dealt with behind the scenes so that one does not lose face.

Evangelical North Americans are individualistic and opinionated and therefore prone more toward confrontation “The Bible says it, I believe it and that settles it,” is not an argument but merely a confrontational slogan. Christians whose motto is “live and let live,” hold a more passive liberal theology and are as useless as the turn-or-burn fundamentalists in communicating the message of Christ to non-belivers.

Muslims of course are in constant conflict. It’s not just a derogatory cartoon that will send them into the streets to riot; they kill their own as a matter of course on issues they find objectionable. Today’s enemy are the infidels, tomorrow it will be the Shiite that lives on the other side of town. “Have a nice day” isn’t a part of their worldview.

The behavior of Hindu’s runs from soup to nuts as it relates to their faith. They either will vehemently argue or arrogantly dismiss those who do not share their beliefs, but they are never neutral.

No matter where you live, the argumentative Indian is in us all. How one manifests that disagreement depends on your culture. In Rome they will ask for a bowl of water as a sign that they will not be involved in such matters, while in Jerusalem they have no problem defending God’s honor by nailing you to a cross. .

Essentializing Experience

New words and phrases are always helpful. Most of us grapple with communicating thought and wish we had better way of saying things. Finding new words or phrases is like finding a precious gem, or perhaps, less dramatic, a morsel of savory meat at the bottom of a bowl of soup.

While attending a missiological consultation a few weeks back, a woman asked the speaker at the conclusion of his presentation how the subject matter related to women (it didn’t make any difference what the subject was, the same woman asked the same question to everyone who spoke). In the course of his response he acknowledged that, being a man, he certainly couldn’t address the subject as it relates to her experience.

“However,” he continued, “I reject the idea that my thoughts are not valid just because I view this situation differently. Essentializing experiences is, on the whole, not helpful.”

Essentializing experience. Great phrase. Don’t know if it’s a word (as my spellchecker can’t find it), but a great thought nevertheless. What does it mean?

When a person makes his or her experience THE experience for everyone to emulate they are essentializing. Essentializing experience is the kissing-cousin of reductionism, i.e. everything can be reduced to a biological, psychological, gender-specific or theological explanation. All religions practice both essentialism and reductionism. I can either prove it through the holy writings or I believe it because I have had an experience.

As a follower of Jesus Christ I can give both a theological as well as an experiential argument for my faith. And, while my experience is important and helpful in dialogue, essentializing my faith neither proves anything nor should be the basis for argument. I may argue that I experienced peace and forgiveness the day I accepted Christ as my Savior and became a decided follower of Him, but my experience does not mean that others must have the same feeling for their faith to be legitimate.

It’s the essentializing of experience that has caused much grief in the church. I’m quite content, though often skeptical, to know that others have experienced healing, talked with Jesus face-to-face, spoke in an unknown tongue or sense a warm feeling of His presence when they pray. However, when others insist that everyone must have that same feeling to be truly born-again, filled with the Spirit or be sanctified, the experience becomes a barrier and a point of contention for those who have not been so blessed with that same experience. Must one shed tears of remorse to be a true repentant? Must one take baptism immediately after embracing Christ to show they are true believer? Personal experience should not be taught as a universal principle.

Is experience therefore unimportant? Of course it’s important, to the believer, and can be used in the course of discussion, but its apologetic value is limited. The Apostle Paul talked about his experience on the road to Damascus (the Lord appearing and speaking to him – Acts 9:1-9), but Paul does not teach that a person must hear from heaven to be a follower and does not suggest that every missionary call must include a blinding light. When Paul recounted his Damascus road experience, non-believers merely dismissed him as being mad.

Space doesn’t allow for the discussion that experience itself is, not only a bad position for argument, it can also be dangerous. False doctrine is born more often through a combination of poor hermeneutics coupled with essentializing experience.

Essentializing experience. Great phrase. Embrace your experience, make sure that it has proper biblical support, but don’t make it an essential doctrine for others.

Names

Most people have heard the story of the soldier who was brought before Alexander the Great to be judged for misconduct.

“What is your name?” the Emperor asked.

Timidly the solder replied, “Alexander, sir.”

Outraged the great general roared, “Either change your ways or change your name.”

Names are a fascinating study. In America, where a name is more likely a reflection of the time than meaning, the days of Fred and Frank of the ‘50’s is now given way to Justin and Jamie of today. We might be grateful for the change as who would want to be stuck with names of the ‘20’s such as Ola (which is my mom’s name) or Wathena or Lila Venus.

In India I am often asked what’s “my good name.” I still don’t know if they want my given or surname, but since they are confused with both Richard and Lewis it doesn’t make much difference what I give them.

In Kenya you can usually get a clue of the tribe of a person by their last name. If it has a strong “gha” or “ka” sound like, “Gichuki” or “Kariuki,” they are usually Kikuyu; names that begin with “M” are Luya’s, such as Mgoya. For the Luo tribe almost all names begin with “O” such as Odinga. I had Luo guy working for me by the name of Ochieng. Whenever I got a letter from him the envelope was addressed to a Mr. Lichard Oruis.

Indians love “pet” names. There are a lot of women called Pinky, a few Bubbles and one Punjabi guy is called Dimples. My advice is if he goes to the states he not take that name with him. Names carry meaning in India as they often reveal status or caste. In the south, where the majority of the Christians live, there are a lot of people with the surname Thomas, Matthews and Samuels. Occasionally I have even met a few David Livingston’s and Charles Spurgeon’s.

While I was in Korea last month I was intrigued with those who had taken on Western names. There are a lot of Kim’s and Cho’s, but their first names are real tongue twisters. When I met my translator she told me her name was Becky.

“Really,” I said. How did you get that name?

She told me her friend gave it to her. I asked others who had taken on Western names how they got theirs. One guy told me that an American friend, who couldn’t pronounce his given first name, said, “You look like a ‘Joe’ to me, and so that’s what I’ll call you.” Now, when he meets an American he just tells them his name is Joe.

I met another Korean by the name of Brian. He said a friend gave him the name and he liked it. When I asked how his wife came to be called Brenda he told me, “My favorite singer growing up was Brenda Lee. I gave her the name Brenda because I loved Brenda Lee.” To me, that’s dangerous. I’m not sure my wife would like it if I called her Raquel (and I will let you guess who I’m thinking about).

In parts of Ethiopia a child is given two names. One that is revealed and one that is secret. The secret name is only revealed when the person is old enough to protect himself.

Some say that we will have a new name when we get to heaven (Rev. 2:17), though I’m not sure of that interpretation. Christ is given a name that only he himself knows (Rev. 19:12). I do think we need to think a bit more about the name Christian, which means “little Christ,” or “follower of Christ.” Like Alexander told the soldier, perhaps sometimes we need to either change our behavior or change our name.

Food and Globalization

“Let me see,” I said to myself as I looked at the menu board in front of me, “what am I hungry for?” There was an assortment of platters: Aloo (potato) Tikki, Biyriani (rice) Combo and the ever popular Pratha (flat bread) N Curry. Since I had my fill of Indian food for the week, I opted for the local made chicken burger.

As I stood in line at the noisy food court in Hyderabad, I observed my social context. Those gathered on the top floor of the mall were young, mostly under 30 years of age and middle class. The price, as well as the quality, of goods sold at the mall is much greater than the street market or bazaar. The music blasted a few decimals short of a jet engine and the kids looked like any other group of kids at any food court. That’s when it struck me…globalization!

Globalization does mean the blending of customs, language, dress and music. Like MTV, which is Rock no matter where you are, though sung in Lao or Latvian, food courts are a global/local phenomena. The new term for today’s trend is “glocal.” Whether the favorite dish is hot dogs (with only mayonnaise) in Santiago, or red chimchi and squid in Seoul, or the fajita wraps in Dallas, fast food at shopping malls is now a part of the international scene.

Those who resist globalization point to food courts as a prime example of the deterioration of culture. Stuart Miller writes in UNDERSTANDING EUROPEANS:

“With some exceptions, Americans are not very interested in the things they eat or in eating itself...we tend to be swallowers rather than tasters. In Milan, the most modern of Italian cities, the business lunch is still virtually unknown. Instead, they have their attention on the moment and they dedicate it to the food and the ceremony of eating. At the table, the food is discussed and food of other meals is remembered and compared with what one is eating now. Often, half the meal is taken up with talking about the food one is eating, the food one ate, the food one will eat, even how food is grown.”

Most people, especially in this hectic fast pace lifestyle of today’s world, treat food more as feed, not something to be savored. However, even in food courts, it’s not what we eat that is the issue but the social context of our dining experience. Anthropologist Mary Douglas states, “Food is a system of social communication...Food may nourish us, but we do not eat in order just to be nourished. Most people do not usually eat alone at irregular times and without the paraphernalia of seated eating. Nor do we eat what is best for us. Food events are like little rituals, [and] like rituals they involve communication.”

My epiphany in Hyderabad was that fast food is today’s version of the “raw,” of ancient man. Raw (or fast) food is for the informal, whereas cooked food is for meaningful communication. Okay, perhaps the food court is a pre-dating ritual for teenagers and therefore important for the socialization of raging hormones. In today’s glocal world food courts symbolize, what Thomas Friedman (THE WORLD IS FLAT) calls, the flattening of the earth.

My thoughts are interrupted as the kid with the funny hat behind the counter says to me in broken English, “Sir, would you like fries with that burger?” No wonder I like this place, it’s just like home.

Wedding Culture

Last week we were invited to attend a wedding reception, which was an interesting cultural experience. The groom is the son of a friend of my wife who is a fellow leader in Bible Study Fellowship here in New Delhi. Some observations about the evening:

The couple is from Kerala, a state in the south where the wedding took place. It’s tradition that the couple will live in with the grooms parents, who live in Delhi, thus the reason for a reception two weeks after the actual ceremony in the south. It was an arranged marriage, like most marriages in India. I didn’t get a chance to do an in-depth research (I was more interested in the food that was served), but my guess the union was based on three things --- both bride and groom were from Kerala and probably close in caste, both belonging to the same church (Marthoma Syrian, which was supposedly founded by St. Thomas, Apostle of Jesus) and, both being from a middle upper class of society.

As the MC was giving his speech the emphases was on the couples education; the groom has an advanced degree in civil engineering and the bride is completing her M.A. in food technology (whatever the heck that is). One can’t help but be struck by the importance of education in this society. I don’t think I ever attended a wedding in the states where they talked about educational and occupational accomplishments, just memories of the couple when they were little and their character qualities as being sweet, honest or hard working.

After the introduction everyone went by to give their gifts and have their picture taken with the bride and groom. Because it was a Christian wedding of a very strict denomination, there was no alcohol served. The Sikh guy who was there to be the D.J. was told to turn off the Punjabi music, so instead, we listened to the Beatles, Bee Gees, John Denver and Abba. We left early, but I understand the kids danced until about midnight. The food was more South Indian -- dal, rice, dosa and masala chicken. It was a non-veg. affair. Because everyone was from Kerala the women wore sari’s, the men wore western suits and those under 25 wore casual sweaters and jeans. The formal comments and most conversation was in English, though the older folks spoke Malayalam.

Being the only non-Indian couple there, it was obviously a very interesting event for Sandy and me. The mosaic of cultures God has created is amazing to observe.

Tolerance Is Not Open-Ended

There’s a fine line between being tolerant of others views yet holding to what we perceive to be truth. Those who have no strong opinions on issues berate those who do have an opinion, characterizing them as intolerant, at best, narrow minded bigots, at worse. Clearly one can be open to others opinion and gently agree to disagree. Depending on whether you are a radical open-minded person (who dismisses anyone who has a strong conviction about anything) or a radical closed-minded person (there is only one way correct answer, which is theirs), will determine whether there is room for dialogue. Example:

Wickets responded to one of my blogs (More Than Religion), stating he had a warm feeling toward Jesus, but had a poor opinion of Christianity. So far so good. I, too, have a poor opinion of institutional Christianity as some times it promotes the vehicle (church or denominationalism) of the message (Christ) than it does the Person (Jesus) of the message. This could be said of all institutional religion, Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist.

Then Wickets said, “For me Jesus is as much sweet & benevolent as is Buddha... and more.” Ooops, we’ve crossed the line of tolerance to no man’s land of radical open-mindedness, i.e. situational ethics, relativism and the territory of whaaateverrrr.

As a follower of Jesus I would, of course, make a distinction between Jesus and Buddha. Actually the two are not in the same camp. Buddha taught self-enlightenment which leads to self-salvation. Jesus, however, taught that man’s salvation could never be attained through his own efforts. The whole reason Jesus came on the scene of the world was to provide salvation through His death and resurrection (I know it’s a strange story to non-believers, but I didn’t write the script, God did).

I realize that religion is divisive. Part of the reason is because of the fanaticism of the open and the closed minded. But a closer study of Jesus will reveal that he was a divisive personality. Heck, they nailed him to a cross because he told the world that he was the way, the truth and the life, and that if anyone wished to see God it would be through him. Jesus was hardly confused in who he was, nor was he very accommodating to those who disagreed with him. For over 2,000 years the person of Jesus continues to be divisive, especially to those who reject his claim or who preach the message of open-mindedness.

Tolerance is not open ended. The line of tolerance ends when a person becomes intolerant of those who hold a conviction of truth. Or, it ends when one seizes a conviction. You can say you love Jesus and Buddha, but in the sight of God, only one claimed to be His Christ. They are not mutually exclusive. Like loving two women, you have to choose one to be your wife…unless, of course, you can find a woman that is tolerant enough to allow you to love others at the same time. It doesn’t work that way on earth; it certainly doesn’t work that way in eternity.